I miss Baba. I miss Baba’s form. I miss Baba’s laugh. I miss Baba’s speech. I miss Baba manifesting through Baba’s vehicles. From everything Baba taught and shared, it is clear that he was focused on his Guru, Nityananda. The Self of All was Baba’s focus. Baba rested in the Heart, where God and Guru reside. As for me, I …
Guru Purnima 2016….
Baba gave me everything—by taking everything away. For that I am so grateful. He shone the truth so brightly that it forced ignorance to run away and die. Wrong knowledge was the food he devoured daily. Our job was not to resist his taking away every delusion we held so dear. And sometimes he grabbed something away from us that …
Stand Firm by Surrendering….
Practice requires us to actually practice. And because this practice is internal, there is no place where practice is not appropriate. And yet, we decide when and where and how to practice. More insidious than this willfulness is our tendency to misunderstand what practice is. From the standpoint of the three gunas, our understanding of sādhana is determined by which …
The Guru Manifests Personally for Us….
Not everyone wants a personal relationship with the Guru. I did. I loved Baba personally and as the Guru, and I still do. Most people want the Guru without any personal relationship. When people see a Guru in human form, instead of being excited by the wonder of this manifestation and his accessibility, they diminish the Guru. This is like …
Om Bhagavan, Muktananda Bhagavan….
As I grow older, my appreciation for Baba only deepens. The more I learn and let go, the more my understanding of what Baba taught, and the way he taught, continues to expand. When I first followed him, I knew enough to be able to treasure Baba; now that I understand so much more, I can’t thank him enough. …
The Manchurian Candidate Student….
Some people do not have the capacity to see me. They decide me. So they never know me; they only know what they project on me. The picture they project depends on what they bring to the table unconsciously. And sometimes, I can’t even recognize myself in their projections. These people already have a guru—their early guru. They are committed …
Five Kinds of Seeker…..
Baba used to say, “I give you what you want so that someday you will want what I have to give”. He was Self-realized and saw the world as it really is. I am not where Baba is, and I am less patient. I have waited and waited and given many students what they wanted. But, as this body ages, …
Climbing the False Mountain….
Self-esteem is nothing more than the small self’s opinion of itself. It is a tale told by an idiot. Any education that prioritizes self-esteem is a course in unreality; it leads the student on a needless journey across an imaginary landscape of illusory meadows and false mountains. When we fixate on self-esteem, we fall prey to the delusion that accomplishment …
True Guru….
Baba left his body 33 years ago, on October 2nd, 1982. At the time, I was seven months pregnant with Ian, my first son. Ganeshpuri had been swirling with conflict and controversy. Because of my pregnancy and my job as librarian of Baba’s closed library, I did not have much contact with all that was being said. Also, people tended …
Spiritual Practice Is Not a Drug….
There is a big difference between doing drugs, basking in śakti, and spiritual practice. That should be obvious, but it’s not. With drugs there is no self-effort, and the result is a counterfeit experience. We are continuing the small self’s delusion; we are on the grid. If we are lucky, we wake up where we started and have a great …