For many years I have used the story of Hansel and Gretel with the breadcrumbs as an example of how we go Home. For us, the breadcrumbs are still there. We can follow them back to who we really are.
The last few weeks my work has been focusing on the self-hate we all have. We have seen that our hate toward the world is actually outward-turned self-loathing. The first step Homeward is stopping the outward hatred. Then comes the hardest moment: choosing whether to continue turning inward and facing our own self-hate, to stay quiet looking outward, or to return to the arena and spew hate everywhere, knowingly or unknowingly.
The question is why go through all the ugly reality of our small selves. Why would anyone choose to face that head-on? Simply, it is the only way Home. We cannot get Home without facing and letting go of our self-loathing. The breadcrumbs are still there. They will be there for our sake. So many things we think we have left behind we must acknowledge as still being with us. We have to choose to retrace our steps back to who we truly are. Each new crumb we come upon is a clue and will help us in our journey. The more we face and pick up the crumbs, the lighter life becomes for us.
The problem for many of us is that we would rather be fattened up and cooked in the oven by the witch than turn around and face ourselves. That way, unless we are rescued—and even if we are—we have no accountability, no agency. We maintain our victimhood. For those who want that, there is plenty of support.
Those of you who truly want to be yourselves will have to search high and low for a guide to help you decipher those breadcrumbs. Swami Muktananda is just such a Being. He guides his disciples Home to Joy and Love and the Truth of who they are. Baba is a guide who knows the terrain of darkness, ignorance and pain. He knows how to bring us out of our self-loathing and into the light of our Home in the Self of All.
Again, for anyone wondering why we just went through that dark patch, have you noticed you can handle it better and are not so identified with it anymore? We have plenty of darkness to face, but as we learn, we find the ease and willingness to move into this part of the inevitable journey. We cannot avoid it forever. Turning away from the fattening and facing the small self with consciousness is the initial step. Then we have to move into the darkness with our light of consciousness shining so clearly that the forest of ignorance is illuminated and we know how to go Home.
When he was in his body, Baba took his disciples through this passage time and time again. For each of us, the darkness had a different twist that was not easy for the untrained eye to see. But he was and is such a great guide, moving us to retrace our path and clean it up as we go.
What a wonderful adventure. Accountability is so freeing. As we retrace our steps with our guide’s help we are more and more free to love, because we are more and more accountable and therefore more and more Us. We have turned around, and are moving farther away from the witch’s oven. Home is just ahead. Let us keep following the breadcrumbs to Love.
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